6th September 2011

Oh my eyes.  MY EYES. 

I cannot unsee what I saw today.  I wish I could, but the damage is permanent.

There was a batshit crazy lady in a shop doorway, pulling up her tights.  Not a little tug at the waist, but proper dress-being-held-up-by-elbows while getting the nylon show on the road.

You know the way little kids playing hide and seek, will often position themselves behind a kitchen utensil or daffodil or something and close their eyes fiercely– working on the solid premise that if they can’t see you, you can’t see them.  Well this particular brand of crazy appeared to have adopted the same premise. So she was facing slightly inwards towards the corner of the shop doorway, while she readjusted her knickers and pulled up her tights – all fidgeting and readjusting and old lady vagina.

Yes, I said Old Lady Vagina – because thats what my eyes were assaulted with.  Her legs/buttocks were all wrinkly folds, like her body had shrunk without telling her skin, but the unwaxed (old) lady garden was an horrific mess of labia and untethered pubes.

In all honestly, I think I’m a little bit blind now.  

I actually had to stop texting my friend and stop dead, because I needed my whole body to appreciate the full disgusting awfulness of this situation.  A veritable assault on my retina.  

Henceforth I am damaged goods.